We’ve all heard this quote before. The idea refers to acting in a way that exemplifies how one would act were they to be in the position they wish to be in. Sounds somewhat complicated but in reality it simply means, act like you would if you had the success you want. I want to focus on how this quote pertains to a few different areas of our lives in terms of using this path to confidence to achieve success.
Success is different for every individual, and applies to each of us in various avenues: career, athletics, and social standing are some areas that a gentleman may want to have some quantifiable success in. “Fake it til you make it” has its limits of course, but is a great way to give yourself the attitude of someone that has achieved the success they desire, and use that attitude to actually make it happen.
Whether or not you desire a successful career in business, education, acting, writing, or any type of career avenue, you inherently have an image or idea in mind of what you want to be and the effect you want to have in your desired field. Now, every field is completely different, and there certainly are attributes of each that don’t carry over from one to the next. However, successful people in every occupation have attributes in common. One of the most important of which is confidence.
Successful individuals have risen through the ranks to get to great heights within their industries. They have reached positions that are both respected and envied by others who want to find themselves in the same position of influence one day. After arriving in those positions, it is natural to channel this admiration and respect into confidence.
Think about this in athletics as well. A prolific scorer in basketball is feared by defenses. Often times a whole defensive strategy is geared towards stopping one player, because they know if that player gets hot then his or her team tends to do very well. Imagine the confidence that comes with that knowledge. Every shot you take you shoot expecting it to go in, and knowing that each time it does it hurts the other team more and more and drives additional fear into them.
Again, confidence works similarly in social standing. Perhaps you want to have the confidence to approach a woman that you’re interested in, or maybe you want to be the life of the party. Take a look at someone that you know that does those things. They are confident. They don’t let insecurities weight them down but think of the positive potential of going after what they want. They approach women believing they’ll be successful, and stroll into social gatherings knowing that they’re going to have a great time and help others have a great time as well.
How you can start the path to confidence
Once again, fake it til you make it. When you step into the office, act as someone who has high value, is highly skilled and highly knowledgeable, and has something to contribute to everyone you come across. People notice confidence in the workplace, especially superiors. You’re boss will surely start to take notice that you’re attacking projects or tasks with an air of predetermined success.
In sports, play with confidence on the field or court, believing each shot will fall and each game will end in a win. As a life-long athlete I can’t vouch for this confidence enough. When you’re playing with confidence there are times where it seems like you legitimately can do no wrong. In soccer, I’ve had shots take double deflections before ending up in the back of the goal. I’ve found myself falling over in the box just to get up as a ball squirts right to me for a tap-in. The more confident you are in athletics, the more circumstances go your way.
The same goes for social settings, although this may be the toughest of them all because we are usually battling the most insecurity in these situations. I am no exception, and definitely struggle here as well. There may be a woman at the bar or at a party that I want nothing more than to go and even just sit down and talk to. Yet a voice in the back of my head will tell me that I’ll get shut down and be embarrassed. That is already a losing mentality, and women can sense that as well. Push those thoughts out of your mind, walk up, be respectful, and approach in a way that says “you and I both will have a great time if I take the time to talk to you right now.”
The steps to real confidence is different for every person. Some my find it extremely hard while others push through any awkwardness and insecurity more naturally. That’s ok. We’re all in this together either way. Take small steps every day to act confidently. Every situation is a learning process and a chance to progress. As you project confidence and are rewarded with successful maneuvering through different situations, your confidence starts to take a very real form.
You’ll be surprised how this confidence becomes more and more natural, to the point where you are no longer faking it, but actually making it.